6 Aug 2023
Linköping, Östergötland (Sweden)
Kalle died by suicide after being placed in the Folåsa institution for girls against his will.
"I'd rather kill myself than come to Sis." That's what Kalle, 14 years old, told his emergency family in May. On August 6, Kalle was found dead.
Kalle is described as curious, quick-thinking and creative. A person who found it easy to learn new things and was liked by everyone. Kalle was born a girl and was named [deadname], but already at the age of 8 began asking his mother questions about gender identity.
I have always tried to support and answer the questions, even if they were sometimes difficult, says mother Zanele. She says that Kalle, who was still called [deadname] at the time, was sexually assaulted by three older guys shortly before.
The abuse was discovered by the school, because the boys talked about it. The boys allegedly told my child "if you want to play with us you have to do this and this" and then the abuse happened, says the mother. She noticed that Kalle felt bad mentally after the abuse, and tried to support as much as she could. At the same time, Kalle continued to be curious and interested in discussing deeper and more complex issues, such as identity. Kalle sought out older children and that's where the problems eventually started when they got older, says the mother. The other children started trying alcohol and Kalle, who had a lack of impulse control, got hooked - and discovered that it was a way to numb the anxiety.
His mother turned to BUP and social services for help. Kalle was diagnosed with ADHD and depression, and together with the social secretary at the time, [his mother] agreed that Kalle should spend some time away in an attempt to break destructive patterns.
Instead of feeling better, Kalle's destructive behavior accelerated. Kalle ran away, drank alcohol and tried various forms of drugs. The social service writes in its application for compulsory care that "Kalle exposes himself to danger through socially destructive behavior in the form of a vagabond lifestyle" and mentions, among other things, that Kalle had an 18-year-old girlfriend.
The first emergency placement was an emergency home where the family says they liked Kalle a lot. "My first impression was that Kalle was a calm guy. He came in straight away and sat down and petted our dog, who also liked him very much", according to his emergency home mother.
The two weeks that Kalle should have been placed in emergency care with the family turned into three months. At home, Kalle primarily played music, and was self-taught in both piano and guitar at an advanced level for a 13-year-old. The foster family did not experience the usual challenges that often exist with children who are placed because of their own behavior.
"It worked very well with Kalle and we had nice conversations. But he constantly had this anxiety that he wouldn't be allowed to stay but would be locked up. I could see that he felt very bad from that worry and that it was the one that made him run away. It was a shock for me when I understood that they transported him to a completely different institution that was much further away", said [his emergency home mother].
Despite the fact that Kalle wanted to be a boy, and at his own request is referred to as "he" in all decisions about compulsory care, Kalle ws placed at the Folåsa institution for girls .
On August 6, Kalle was found dead by suicide in his room at the Sis home. His mother only got the news half a day later.